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I Wish I Could Tell You

I wish I could tell you.

I wish I could share with you that I preformed a heroic action to explain my concussion. An act such as:

Three weeks ago, I was driving down a twisty road only to come around a curve and see my friend’s house engulfed in flames. She was in her front yard screaming with pain for her small child was trapped inside. Though she tried several times to get to her son, her broken leg and smoke-filled lungs limited her rescue efforts. As I surmised the situation, her heart poured out the need with two words; “MY BABY!” No ambulance had arrived, the fire trucks were on the way, but help was needed NOW.

SO I DID WHAT ANY GOOD FRIEND WOULD DO. 🙂

I put on my super-woman cape and ran through the front door. I climbed the stairs to find her child crying in his crib. I scooped him up, hugging him close. By now, the fire had grown, and the stairs were no longer an option for our escape route. Holding him ever so tightly to protect him from the fall, I jumped through the upstairs window, landing heroically on their gravel driveway below. The child was unscathed, but I hit my head and received multiple contusions. I sustained a significant concussion and sprained my wrist. However, those were small prices to pay for the life of this precious child! I was able to place the baby in his momma’s arms, and the world was right again.

I wish I could tell you that is how I got my concussion, bruises, scrapes, and a badly sprained wrist.

However, the truth is, I was riding my bike on a gravel trail, and un-heroically fell off. (That is not as dramatic as the story I want to tell you, but that is the embarrassing truth.)

Yes, I came around a curve as the trail dipped, and I wasn’t prepared. I squeezed the brake too hard and lost control.

There was no burning house, no dramatic momma screaming (my husband yelled for 911, but that’s another story), no baby at risk, and NO helmet. That last ‘no’ was the real issue.

As I fell, I hit my head and landed on my left side receiving some significant “road rash” and tried to catch my weight with my right wrist. I don’t remember much about the next 15 minutes or so. Terry tells me I passed out three times, and on the third time, as he yelled “call 911” to a group way too far to hear, the volume of his voice “brought me around.” I did not want to go to the hospital, and after a while, with Terry’s help, I walked to the truck (about 1/2 mile away).

Later that night, my husband insisted we go to the ER to make sure my noggin had no bleeding on the brain. Thank goodness, the results proved no immediate danger.

However, the Cat scan did show “clouding” on my brain unrelated to the fall and instructions were given to follow through with a MRI as a precaution. The doctor wanted to rule out MS.

Wait . . . What?!

For someone who has not been to the hospital since her babies were born, this news was a bit scary. The real challenge was waiting for the test results with the “what if’s” of MS lurking in the back of my mind.

Friends, have you ever faced a potentially life-alternating scare? Have you had to wait for answers? Me, too! I must tell you; God gave me an unexplainable peace as I came to grips with the positive or negative results. This peace was from Him, not me.

During the wait, here are some things I learned:

  1. Wear a helmet ALWAYS.

  2. Carbs are good for the brain. Who knew, but thank you, Jesus! 🙂

  3. When unable to have screen time or even read books, etc I learned, I do not have enough Scripture memorized.

  4. I have a new sympathy for those facing long term illnesses. They are quite heroic and brave souls.

  5. Jesus really is enough.

  6. Friends, family, and a pastor and his wife have an even deeper place in my heart. Loved ones are the wind beneath my wings.

  7. You really can have peace instead of panic.

Honestly, I had an unexplainable calm. Well, that is up until the technician placed a ‘cage’ on my head, and trapped me in a long claustrophobic tube with screaming noises during the MRI.

But ladies, life has it’s twist and turns with valleys and hills. We all face them. Many times life just seems unfair. I still fight for my mind in this world of fears and unknowns. I have wondered why our good God allows bad things. And honestly, I don’t know why, except to say we live in a fallen world. God did not create this universe to be this way. God gave mankind the freedom to make choices, and mankind’s choices have led us down a slippery slope into a hurting world. Now, ‘stuff’ happens.

BUT I do know this: God is with you and me when our world is falling apart. God sees us when we are fighting for some sort of normality in our life. He is with us when we are afraid. David felt the same fear when he wrote, “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me” in Psalms 23.

I also know we can come into His presence at any time. “And so, dear brothers and sisters, we can boldly enter heaven’s Most Holy Place because of the blood of Jesus.” Hebrews 10:19 (NLT) I know we have this incredible gift called prayer. For example, during my MRI testing, my brain and I went to the beach praying and humming praise, though fighting tears. And deep down I knew, God is good in the good and the bad.

I also know when I called on friends to pray (you know who you are) they prayed with me. In our pain, we must not pull back from loved ones. Instead, place those caring friends around you. Let them walk in the journey with you.

I am grateful to report to you today my MRI results came back negative for the MS. To quote my brother in law, “The MRI proved what he has known for years, there is nothing in my brain.” 🙂 We really do love each other, but enjoy hiding it well! ha.

Dear friend, whatever problems you are facing today, we all want to be able to say we put on our superwoman cape and rescued the day! But honestly, are we not all in need of rescue?

This I can tell you, I know a Savior who is the only one who truly can save us. His name is Jesus. You can lean on Him in the good and the bad. He is the one to give strength for life’s unexpected twist and turns. He provides peace in panic. He sees and cares about your every struggle and deepest hurts. He gives comfort in the wait.

Yes, that is what I will tell you, because that is the truth.

Disclaimer: The above pic was taken three weeks ago. My road rash has healed, my splint is off, and I am doing much better, just a few headaches that come and go. In fact, last Tuesday, I even put on a real bra and make-up and felt like a new woman. Thank you for being so wonderful to my children as they filled in for me on this blog. Thank you for the texts, old fashion cards, prayers, flowers, delicious meals, groceries, and physical visits. I am forever grateful. You are the most amazing followers and friends. And that too is the truth. 🙂

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